Silk-touch joke blankets

Silk-touch blanket

Becomes a parent

“When does a joke become a dad joke?” When it becomes a parent.

Because they lactose

“Why do cows have hooves instead of feet?” Because they lactose.

Aye matey

“What did the pirate say when he turned 80?” Aye matey

No eye deer

“What do you call a deer with no eyes?” No eye deer

An investigator

“What do you call an alligator wearing a vest?” An investigator

A stick

“What do you call a boomerang that doesn’t come back?” A stick.

A gummy bear

“What do you call a bear with no teeth?” A gummy bear

When it's a jar

“When is a door not a door?” When it’s a jar.

Elephino

“What do you get when you cross an elephant and a rhino?” Elephino

Because they make up everything

“Why can’t you trust atoms?” Because they make up everything!

Dam

“What did the fish say when it swam into a wall?” Dam

Outlaws are wanted

“What is the difference between in-laws and outlaws?” Outlaws are wanted.

Walking, JK rolling

“How did Harry Potter get down the hill?” Walking. JK, rolling.

Really good at it

“Why don’t you ever see elephants hiding in trees?” Because they’re really good at it.

Can't c in the dark

“Why is “dark” spelled with a “k” and not a “c”?” Because you can’t c in the dark

A condescending con descending

“What do you call a snobby criminal going down the stairs?” A condescending con descending.

Nice belt

“What did 0 say to 8?” Nice belt.

A waist of time

“What do you call a belt made of watches?” A waist of time...

Anna One Anna Two

“What did the drummer name his twin daughters?” Anna One... Anna Two

A can't opener

“What do you call a can opener that doesn’t work?” A can’t opener